Dream of the Month (June 2009)
- Title: Descending A Snowy Staircase To The Center Of The Earth
- Date of the Dream: 2009 (mailed Sunday, 24 May 2009)
- Dream: I was descending a very snowy stairway down into the middle of the earth. Everything was covered with snow and it was a very narrow and constricted staircase. There was nowhere to go but down. I was following other people and I was worried about going too deep. I hesitated, then turned around and started to go back up.
The next night I dreamed of a huge gorilla like King Kong. He was sweet looking; but I was afraid of him. My two brothers were with me and they started climbing giant walls to distract him, so he would follow them and stay away from me. After they both did that, the gorilla looked at me and I felt like I had to do something to keep him at a safe distance; then I woke up.
- Significant life event: I am very much in love with my boyfriend of 2 years. I am divorced, my previous marriage was a difficult one with a controlling and demeaning oversexed man. My boyfriend has never been married, and does not believe in marriage. He's 48, I'm 51 but am told I look 40. We have a great relationship and our love life was really great, but after 6 months he was no longer interested in sex. He finally admitted that he cannot have sex unless he objectifies a woman and he has problems with intimacy. It has ruined every relationship he's had and he is hoping I will stay with him. He says and acts like he is very much in love with me and is very committed to our relationship, although he will never get married. He is on medication that takes away the sex drive. I am struggling with being in a relationship with a man who will never commit or have sex with me. I am mourning the loss of our intimacy.
- Personal concerns/issues: Almost everyone is telling me to leave him and think of my own needs, but I love being with him and I don't want to end it. I don't know if I can handle not being with him.
- Associations: I think Winter means the death of our intimacy or me ending our relationship. I'm struggling with following other people's suggestions to end it, but I don't want to (following other people down the staircase, then turning around to go back up). The Gorilla could be how overwhelming my issue is - representing him. I get very emotional and I am always feeling very hurt.
- Category: None Apply
- Pen Name: Anna
Dr. Holloway's Comments:
Striking Characteristics: Snow can represent the end of an episode or chapter in life; but it also implies that after that emotional season, a new beginning is possible.
These two brief dreams illustrate how the dreaming mind can tackle an important question in very different story forms. In the staircase scene, the dreamer is experiencing “the descent” which is the ending phase or the disintegration of a form in her life. Something is drawing to a close and she feels the sadness and the downward spiral associated with loss. She is worried about how deep this wound may be; and is also instinctively worried about being “dragged down” into sadness by what seems to be an unavoidable change. The narrow and constricted staircase possible is symbolic of intimacy, but it may simply be the step-by-step downward journey she has been taking. As she turns to climb back up, it appears that she has decided on a deep “core” level that she is not going to let this episode extinguish her own spirit, not matter how it may hurt emotionally.
The King Kong scene underscores her decision to survive and save herself. While there is something likable about this monster, she knows that she must distance herself from him, and she is right. The presence of her brothers is a wonderful sign, as brothers in such a dream represent the powerful energies within a woman's psyche, which rally to her aid when her compassionate or romantic promptings are pulling her into a quagmire. The deeper mind helps us to awaken to the course of action that is for the highest good of all concerned, and often this decision is made in the depths of our dreams. Despite the pain and grief this dreamer no doubt feels, she is going to choose light, life and wisdom as her path.